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Green with Disappointment

I could not believe it, when I woke up yesterday morning to signs of the flu so I did what any reasonable person who doesn’t have time for the flu would do, I stayed in denial. We are about to leave for 10 days, I have laundry and packing to do, a session to shoot, a Session Premier following that and play dates for the kids. It made sense that denial was my very best option, so I stuck with it. {It wasn’t the flu} But as the day progressed and the bathroom tile became more soothing I realized that I wasn’t going to win this one.

But my session… This couple was on a deadline and I knew there was no way I would be able to schedule them in again before they needed these images. I’d promised and made such a great impression by being able to make this happen for them. I could handle ruining that. No matter what I wan’t going to look good, I had to choose the lesser of the two evils. I could either look like a complete flake or literally look terrible. I chose the literal. I picked myself up, washed my face and tried to convince myself I had this. Almost believed myself… ran back to the bathroom. Picked myself up again and got in the car.

What arrived was a horrifyingly green tinted version of me. I felt so weak that I left everything but my camera and my favorite (and lightest lens – the 50) in the car. The session started, I kept some serious distance so as not to spread any germs. Normally I joke that I don’t acknowledge personal space – I was definitly keeping the 6 inch rule (more like 6 feet rule) in this case! My clients were being so nice and forgiving as what ever it is they were seeing stood in front of them. We got about 1/2 through. I had to stop twice to collect myself. I finally – after breaking out in horrible cold sweat – called it, but not before I was sure I got the shot.

It’s not always going to go perfect. This certainly isn’t my first time having things go bad and I know it’s not my last either. But I can say I’m proud of how I handled it. I tried and really that’s all any of us can do.

It’s what we do with what’s given to us that defines who we are.

I’ll be the first to admit that I have not always defined myself in the best light. But I mean really, are you surprised by that? Of course not, because none of us are perfect. We are all a work in progress. But that’s what I love about life, that every day I can try again. This morning I woke up and the day was brighter, I was ready to eat food again and I was beginning to feel my normal self. I got the laundry but mean-mugged the piles the whole time – yep, must be back to my old self!

As for my clients, we’ll have a second session in a couple weeks when I get back. I can’t wait for them to meet real Leah, cause this girl from yesterday… Blah!

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  1. Stephie J. says:

    Awe…I hope you feel better, Leah. I always wondered how a day like that would go. You just suddenly don’t feel well the morning of a shoot. You can’t call out when you are the only one on the team. Cudos for toughing it out…and got a nice shot at that :-)!

  2. Kalli says:

    Love it! I was just in denial last week and I couldn’t believe how good (and bad) I felt afterward for sucking it up and holding up my part of the deal. Did you end up telling the clients you weren’t feeling well? This also might be a good place to have a photographer friend that has a similar style and quality to your own to be able to call as a backup in situations like these!

  3. brigita says:

    hope you feel better soon

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