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BTS: Outsourcing, Systems and Keeping Our Spouses Feeling Prioritized with Kelli France (Episode 13)

LISTEN ON YOUR FAVE PLATFORM: Apple // Audible  // Google  //  Stitcher

This will help:

👉 Anyone who needs help delegating 
👉 Those who feel overwhelmed with all the things 
👉 Anyone looking to connect more with their spouse 

In this episode: 

2:32 Lacking Balance and Boundaries
4:58 Systems Are The Only Way To Go
8:27 D.A.R.E (How Kelli Does Momlife and Business Well) 
12:02 I Cannot Do It All : Outsourcing and Delegating 
21:06 Making Time For Your Spouse 
32:40 How to Keep Date Night From Becoming Boring 
37:38 Overnighters and Couple Trips

Lacking Balance and Boundaries

Kelli and I both started our businesses around the same time and with little kids. Kelli admits that she hasn’t always been great at balancing and in fact remembers writing in her journal about feeling like she was drowning. She was finding it hard to balance business and motherhood and found herself feeling bitter and resentful toward her family, which was the opposite of what she wanted! That realization was the beginning of a journey to get better balanced. 

Systems Are The Only Way To Go

Systems are the best way to balance busy, otherwise you are constantly reinventing the wheel. For Kelli, she needed systems that she could remember step by step. You feel a lot more peaceful when everything is on paper. And for Kelli that has been a huge game changer because it was a way of automating a lot of the things that she was doing regularly, whether it was daily, weekly, monthly or quarterly.

Having systems makes life so much easier.  I think about the amount of brain energy that we are giving away when there’s no checklist, when there’s no system, when we feel like, wait, what am I supposed to do? What am I forgetting? And yet we’ve done these things over and over. And if we would just systemize, we could have so much more peace. It is so critical that your systems are simple. SYSTEMS MUST BE SIMPLE. You will not do it if it’s complicated. 

D.A.R.E (How Kelli Does Mom Life and Business Well)

Kelli is a word nerd and loves her acronyms. In order to feel and show up as her best, as both a mom and in business, she uses this acronym: D.A.R.E: Delegate, Automate, Reevaluate, and Eliminate. This is the way she is evaluating and prioritizing her life. When Kelli feels off, overwhelmed, or out of alignment she “DAREs” herself to go through each of these actions. What can she delegate? Is there anything in her life or business she could automate better? What’s not working and needs to be completely reevaluated? And what just straight up needs to go? 

I Cannot Do It All : Outsourcing and Delegating 

Outsourcing and delegating tasks is a huge part of how both Kelli and I stay intentional and present, both in our businesses and with our families. When I asked Kelli what she delegates, the first thing she said was “I no longer bake cakes!”  This used to be a source of mom guilt for her, but she quickly realized that she could outsource something she hated (and admittedly wasn’t very good at) and allow someone else to use their talents and love to save time and end up with a better result. That is the gift of outsourcing!  But don’t stop there! Kelli also hasn’t done laundry in about a decade. She started by just having a teenager come once a week to help fold and put away clothes and says it was the best $15 of her week.  It was something that wasn’t getting done, that was causing her stress, and was something that was easily handed over. 

My first house cleaner was also a teenager! I think a good thing to recognize is that you don’t necessarily need to start at the top of the top and outsource everything.  Figure out what you’re comfortable being able to say yes to, and start there. For both of us, we started small with hiring a local teen to come help us out with very limited hours and we grew from there. 

We both also outsource and delegate in our businesses, not just in our homes. Kelli has a podcast manager, an assistant for her direct sales business, and someone who helps with her social media content. But again, it’s important to know that these all came in at different times and not all at once. It’s okay to start small when you begin to outsource. 

Making Time For Your Spouse 

We talk a lot about business and motherhood and making sure that we make time for and are intentional with our kids, but I don’t think people talk enough about making our marriages a priority and making our partner feel as important as they did when we were dating. Kelli and I have both been married a long time. We’re both over the 20 year mark now and so we’ve had some time to figure this out and get it right. And and we’ve both had times where we got it wrong.  We’re not perfect by any stretch.

A weekly standing date night is what keeps Kelli’s marriage front of mind, and they like to keep it simple.

Date night is Saturday night. The reason they chose Saturday night is because by the end of Saturday, they were both feeling ready to get out. It’s been really great for them because they know that no matter how crazy the week gets, they have Saturday night to look forward to. 

How to Keep Date Night From Becoming Boring 

If every single week you’ve got a date night, you might be wondering how to keep it exciting? How do you keep it from becoming something we have to do versus looking forward to it and being excited? Kelli keeps it simple and spontaneous with not a lot of planning. They hop into the car a lot of times and just see where they end up! She says, “as a huge foodie, it never gets boring!”

Now that our kids are older, my hubby and I actually get multiple dates a week. Some are just very spontaneous like grabbing lunch. We also have our planned out dates. We love to mix it up by going out on double dates with other couples, or trying something new. Something I love doing is coming up with a lot of different ideas and putting them into a jar and just pulling one idea out. 

A fun idea that Kelli mentioned is this new adventure scratch off dating book, where you don’t know what your date is until you scratch it off. You can check it out here

Overnighters and Couple Trips 

Getting uninterrupted time alone is so key in making sure your spouse feels like a priority. And listen, I get it. It can be hard to make these trips happen. Whether you jet away for a week in Europe, stay one night in a local hotel, or even just send the kids away and get a night alone at your house, it’s the intention behind it that really matters. 

There are going to be seasons where bigger more extravagant trips are what you can do, and seasons where budgets and time might be a little more tight. But having the intention and the expectation of planned away and alone time is huge. 

Kelli and I could talk forever, but I hope you’ve found value in our conversation today. I definitely encourage you to go to the links to all the things that we’ve talked about and shared below. 

Kelli has some amazing opportunities for you. You can join her book club for free and you can check out her podcast, Finally Fearless. 

LINKS YOU’LL LOVE:

Scratch off date ideas: https://amzn.to/3eWgSrz 

Greg McKeown – Effortless https://amzn.to/3SgxBUZ 

Kelli’s Podcast episode with Greg McKeown – https://kellifrance.com/2021/03/17/do-less-but-better-with-greg-and-anna-mckeown/ 

Kelli’s Free Personal Development Book Club https://kellifrance.com/bookclub 

Listen to Kelli’s Podcast https://kellifrance.com/podcast

Find out where you’re losing time every day and if your business is taking more time than it should.

Enroll in my FREE course and learn how to drop an entire work day a week!

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