We as women are hard enough on ourselves, without any help from anyone else. I’m pretty sure on a personal level we can all agree on that. And yet, we forget to extend this truth for others.
Every day I struggle with my own feelings of ‘not enough’. Every. Single. Day. In one form or another, they come. Any yet, I stand tall (well I try to, I’m a bit of a sloucher) and I put on a big smile (I’m good at that one) but the truth is, sometimes inside I feel really small.
Yesterday was a particularly fragile day. Just a whole lot of things weighing on me at the same time. I couldn’t seem to find how to turn the faucet in my eyes off. I didn’t want anyone to see me cry, so I looked at my hubby who knew instantly and asked him to help me find an escape route. We walked out a side door from church and he took me to the closest place, his parent’s house. Everyone else was at church still, I walked straight upstairs kicked off my pumps and climbed right into the perfectly made guest bed and then tried to protect my MIL’s beautiful white sheets from my mascara that seemed to be leaking all over the pillow. He brought me up tea (cause he’s that amazing) and listened to my sobs because there were just to many little cracks in that moment and I just couldn’t seem to hold it together any longer.
And normally I wouldn’t tell you that, it’s just not my style. I’m happy to be vulnerable but I don’t like the attention of ‘poor you’. If that makes any sense to anyone but me, thank you!! But today I’m sharing, because we all have fragile moments. That’s real life. And maybe sharing mine will help you realize it’s okay to have yours (and let me know I’m in good company!)
The thing is, I was back at church that night carpooling girls and no one would have known about earlier. Except maybe the evidence of slightly puffy eyes and vanishing mascara. My point is, I hid it. And most people are hiding what they are going through because we can’t all walk around with badges that admit the wounds were nursing on the inside.
We have to STOP looking at each other with judgment (may that be because you think they have it all together or because you think she has none of it together).
We need each other. We need to be lifted and encouraged, we need to be smiled at and hugged. We are all fragile. There will be moments when we are each carrying burdens that others can’t see. What could we heal if we treated everyone like they deserved compassion before contempt?
Today my message is this, if you are feeling fragile… Hold on! Keep trying, keep loving, keep smiling, and keep trusting. You are enough, you can do this!
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