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Confessions Of a Bad Homemaker (Ep 53)

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As women, we are expected to be all things and do it all. We are supposed to have a clean and organized home, make extravagant meals every night, and still manage to have quality time with our family. But the reality is, it’s impossible to do everything. And full confession:

I am a bad homemaker.

Yep, I’m really here airing my dirty laundry (don’t worry, we’ll cover how in the heck our actual laundry gets done in a second) and opening up a very real and honest conversation about the expectations that we put on ourselves, as wives, mothers, business owners, and homemakers.

Let’s ditch the homemaker guilt! Call in the help we need, and have the family and home life that we desire. Are ya with me?!

This episode will help:

👉 Overwhelmed and guilt-ridden WAHM’s stop feeling like they have to do it all

👉 Busy entrepreneur women outsource and delegate

👉 You realize you can be everything! You just can’t do everything!

In this episode:

02:08 Helpful Gadgets and Tools
04:08 Laundry System
06:01 Raising Independent Children
07:54 Dinner System
11:18 Letting Go of Perfection
16:50 Let people help you

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The Real Secret

Okay, here’s the real secret: I had to let go of the idea that being a homemaker meant doing everything myself. That’s why I have my kids cook dinner one night a week, and we have a fend-for-yourself night. My best friends are Fred and George, I use things like grocery delivery and cleaning service. Because I have realized that while I can be everything (wife, stay-at-home mom, business owner, volunteer, healthy and active, someone who gets 8 hours of sleep a night), I can’t do everything, and that’s okay.

And yes, it’s taken me time to get to this realization and to be at this point without feeling guilt (Kinda like in Twilight when Edward pushes Bella into a wall because she got a paper cut and Jasper tried to eat her, and instead of being overcome with my guilt and trying to run from it I decided to try and work it out! Also, team Jacob forever!!!). Because there were definitely days when I had guilt.


Helpful Gadgets and Tools

So… you’re probably wondering who Fred and George are; well, that would be my IRobot and robot mop (And yes, they are named after the brothers in Harry Potter 😂).

They are my best friends who clean while I sleep. They really are magical! Now I need to tell you that I used to feel soooo guilty about investing in tools and gadgets to help with homemaking. In fact, I even got my first Roomba from Craigslist because I couldn’t justify the cost. But now, I realize they bring me joy, buy me back precious time, and make my home a happier place. There are so many tools and gadgets, and services that can help us to be better homemakers.

Another thing I use and talk about often is grocery delivery. Yes, it comes at an additional cost, but outsourcing and delegating allow me to continue balancing the busyness and get dinner on the table without skipping a beat.


Dinner System

Speaking of dinner. This is an area in which I have really had a mindset shift. Dinner is really important to me. Gathering around the table and having family dinner together with my family is one of my highest core values and priorities. And I used to think that meant that I and only I could make the dinner. In fact, I had it in my head that they needed to be extravagant dinners…nothing simple for us!

I have since come to my senses. And implemented a dinner system (you know I love my systems!) where I have delegated cooking out to my kids! One way we’ve made this work is by using a meal plan kit like Hello Fresh, so they have all the ingredients and recipes right there for them, and it’s been an awesome thing for our family.

7 Dinners a week can look like:

3 kids = 3 nights of dinners taken care of by them and HelloFresh
1 fend-for-yourself night
1 take-out night
___
I’m down to 2 dinners I’m in charge of a week while still having my dream of family dinners come true!


Laundry System

Okay, I told you we would get to the dirty laundry, and here we are! I also have recruited the help of my kids. I do my own and Taylor’s laundry, but the kids are in charge of their own. They each have a specific day of the week to get theirs done. If they miss it….well, they are stretching until the next week.


Raising Independent Kids

At this point, you might be thinking, geez, lady, what don’t your kids do?!? And don’t worry, I have thought that enough times. But here’s the cool thing. I have my oldest going off to college in the fall, and I know that she is completely capable of being on her own. She can cook, do her own laundry, clean. Etc. In fact, her roommates are super excited because they know they are gonna eat well with her!

But boy, did I have a lot of guilt sometimes when I was having them help out, and thoughts like “I really should be doing this” crept into my mind. But now I am so proud of them and so grateful that I didn’t let these ideas that I had, that I was supposed to be doing it all get in the way of giving them the opportunity to work hard and to learn how to do these things.

So this is my confession as a bad homemaker, and I hope it gives you some ideas on how you can have more of what you want! Which for me is a clean house, family dinners, and us spending more time together. And find creative ways to do it.


LINKS YOU NEED:

I’d love to connect and know your thoughts on this episode. Find me on Instagram!

Want to learn how to drop an entire workday a week? Grab my FREE COURSE

OTHER EPISODES YOU’LL LOVE:

From Funk to Flow (Ep 31)

Outsourcing Explained Part 1 (Ep28)

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