Description: In this episode of the Balancing Busy podcast I have an amazing conversation with Camille Walker. Camille is the host of the podcast, Call Me CEO. In fact, I was recently a guest on her podcast. You can catch my episode on her show here.
Camille shares with us how we can set ourselves up to balance the busy in times when we just aren’t feeling it: Those times when things don’t seem to be going smoothly, or we feel like we are in a funk. Let’s be honest, it’s easier to manage all the things when there’s a pep in your step and things are going really well, but it’s an entirely different feat to balance the busy when things aren’t going as planned.
This will help:
👉 Get out of a funk and back into flow
👉 Busy entrepreneurs identify their “women at the well”
👉 Business mamas create a community of support
In this episode:
4:01 Women at the Well
9:32 Setting Yourself Up for When Things Get Hard
14:56 Focusing On What You CAN Do
18:41 How To Motivate Yourself (When You Really Aren’t Feeling It)
23:58 Safe People To Talk To
28:06 You Must Have Self Compassion
The Women at the Well
As humans, we know that we are going to experience highs and lows. So it’s really important to establish the people that you can rely on when things shift and change, because they will. You could experience an emergency or just kids getting sick and end up having to shift your schedule around. Your situation could be anything: mental, physical, or emotional.
Life happens, sometimes we’re just stuck in a rut. Being able to count on those people that you already have in your circle and in your support system who will give you the comfort of having a group that you can rally when you’re having low times.
How Do You Help Yourself When Things Are Hard
One of the things that I think about when things start to get hard is that I first let go of the things that will make me feel better. When I’m feeling extra busy, it’s easy for me to let the workout slide or to think that I don’t have time for the foods that fuel me, so I grab something “quick” and go to the foods that are gonna give me a big crash.
When things are hard, how do you set yourself up so that you can make that period of time as short as possible? Let’s make sure we’re not prolonging and extending this pain or this negative experience because of the choices we’re making.
Camille shares that she checks in on herself first and asks, “what do I need?” She says that focusing on just three things helps her to stay grounded. For this season, her three things are water, walking, and meditation. But she makes it even more simple because when you are in a hard season, simplicity is key.
With her water, instead of having a goal of how many ounces she needs per day, her goal is simply to always have her water bottle with her. That way, she’ll automatically be drinking more, but she isn’t tied to a specific number. You can give yourself a win without a lot of excessive pressure.
Focusing On What You CAN Do
When times get hard, it’s easy to focus on what you can’t do or where you are lacking. Camille shares that she is recovering from a surgery that’s been a lot harder than she anticipated. While she could focus on all the ways she’s been held back, she has chosen to flip that. Sure, she could complain that she can’t attend her favorite pilates and HIIT classes or she can focus on what she can do. For her, that is walking. Each day she has a goal to get outside and walk. Shifting that focus from can’t to can makes all the difference.
How To Motivate Yourself (When You Really Aren’t Feeling It)
Sometimes the best thing to do when you aren’t feeling motivated is to infuse a little fun into your life. Camille has what she calls a “joy list” where she takes inventory of what she knows will bring her joy and bring back that pep. Rather than just sitting around and doing nothing, she suggests doing the thing that feels luxurious and rebellious to you.
Whether it’s in rest or work, we can have fun!
And while making time for joy and being rebellious by heading out to a 3:00 afternoon movie by yourself might not seem like the most productive thing, it really can be the thing you need. This is an idea that I have to really work on. It’s hard for me to have a day doing nothing, and if this is you, you’re not alone. I invite you to at least give the idea of a “joy day” some consideration.
Safe People To Talk To
It is so powerful to have someone you can talk to, as long as we are careful about who they are and how they show up for us. We all have people in our lives who feed off drama and might leave us feeling worse when we vent to them. We need to make sure we have people we can talk to honestly and who can be honest with us. We need people who don’t just agree with our frustrations but also push us to think critically and are going to help us find solutions.
Camille shares that she loves to go on “walks and talks.” Sometimes she gets outside and in person with a friend or other times, she’s on a treadmill having a phone call. She gives herself time to talk and process with a trusted person. I love this idea. It’s a great and easy way to pull yourself out of a funk.
You Must Have Self Compassion And Ask For Help
We do not need to be hardwired for burnout. When you’re in a funk or things feel off or aren’t going your way, the number one thing you need is self-compassion. We’re in a culture where, especially as women, we look at ourselves as the doers, like we need to be able to do all the things.
It gets really lonely when you think you have to do this all on your own. You might think no one can help you and that you can’t open yourself up. That feeling can become really dangerous and depressing. And that’s not a place where productivity or our best selves will come through.
- Have self-compassion
- Call on your community when you need it. Think about the women at the well. We used to live in tighter communities where the women were all helping each other. If we can cultivate that community we will all be more productive and happier too.
Camille shared so many good insights and real tips to help us kick the funk and create our ideal community.
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[00:00:00] Leah: Welcome to the Balancing Busy Podcast. I’m so excited that you are here listening to this episode today. I have Camille Walker and we are having a discussion. It’s so good. I just finished it and now I’m recording this intro and you’re gonna jump into this conversation where we’re talking about, you know, we’re all about balancing busy.
[00:00:53] We’re all about just feeling better in all the areas, but let’s be real, the hardest. To feel better is when we’re in a funk is when things aren’t going great, is when there’s something that we’re going through. That’s hard because it’s one thing to do all those things. Drink your water, get your exercise, get the right amount of sleep.
[00:01:13] Be productive in your business. Have dinner on the table. Do the laundry. When there’s like a pep in your step when you’re feeling good, it is completely another thing when things are hard. So Camille and I have a conversation about like, what do we do? How do we balance the busy when everything is not going our way or is not going according to plan?
[00:01:35] And we talk about some of the things that help each of us and some of the areas. It has been hard for us, so I’m so excited for you to jump into this episode. Camille is a certified family science teacher, blogger, podcast host and entrepreneur. She is the founder of my mommy style.com, a lifestyle website dedicated to making mom’s lives easiers through recipes, lifestyle tips, parenting hacks.
[00:01:59] You probably have something from. Saved on Pinterest. Her passion for encouraging moms through the years has led her to coaching women in building online businesses, hiring virtual assistants, and creating that work-life balance, which, you know, is what I am all about. So, of course, I’m so excited she’s here and I have gotten to know her over the last year.
[00:02:17] I got to be on her podcast, call me, c e o, which is a podcast sharing behind the scenes stories of mothers, building businesses and raising families.
[00:02:25] I am going to make sure that I link to our episode in the show notes.. It is her hope to encourage mothers everywhere to give themselves permission to create a life They love embracing motherhood and their own passions, and that is something that I am so passionate as well.
[00:02:39] So let’s jump right into this episode and let’s get into how we balance the busy when everything does not feel amazing.
[00:02:50] Camille, thank you so much for being here. I just finished introducing everyone to you, telling ’em how amazing you are. So we are going to just jump right in. Awesome. Thank you for having me. Oh, so, so excited. Okay, so we talked about this a little, uh, before we pressed record, but just talking about how.
[00:03:11] It’s one thing to balance the busyness when everything is going really well, when our time is working out really well and we can, you know, get the workout in and we can do all the things in our business and we’re just feeling positive and happy. It’s like, you know, I just imagine someone walking down the street and they’re like, kind of got like a, a pep in their step, right.
[00:03:28] And it is a very, very different thing when, when something goes wrong, when something interrupts our, our quote unquote perfect flow. Um, whether that be a, a health problem or a, uh, something going on with, with one of our family members or whatever it might be. So today I really wanna focus and talk about how we balance the busy and how we get back to that more positive pep in our.
[00:03:56] Space when things aren’t going perfectly. .
[00:04:01] Camille: Yeah, I love that. I mean, I think for any, the human existence is to go through all of the things, right? To have a human experience is to have the highs and the lows, and so I think as you’re creating systems or the balance or knowing how to refuel yourself, that is essential to understand when things are going good so that when things are going bad, whether it.
[00:04:24] You know, an emergency or with your kids or someone sick or you’re ill or you’re recovering from something, whether it’s mental, emotional, or physical, those times will happen. So it’s really important to establish the routines that you can rely on. And the way I like to look at it is, um, having women at the, well, people that you already have in your circle and in your support system so that you feel like you have a group that you rally with when they’re ha having low times.
[00:04:52] And that also you can rely. .
[00:04:55] Leah: I love that so much. I love that concept of women at the, at the well, because like I’m visualizing the stories and you know, just all of it. So I guess my first question would be how do we identify our women at
[00:05:10] Camille: the well? Yeah. Ooh. You know, this is something that I have been trying to teach to my daughter, and not so much in that language, but she’s 12 going into seventh grade this next year, and I think that there are, and I, it’s hard for me to explain this because I feel like some of us are more sensitive to the energies and emotions of other people, and we can know pretty soon whether or not that person is for us or against us.
[00:05:37] There’s a, a viral video that was going out recently of Brene Brown who is talking about flame blower outers, that’s what she called them, like flame blower outers, where. There are people in your life who are going to want to see you succeed, to glow, to be like a part of the show. And then there are others who will very specifically look for ways to blow out your flame and to to bring you down.
[00:06:01] And I think that that’s something that we learn as children and sometimes and often too much as adults. Uh, those signals can be. And it’s something that maybe as a child you are looking to be a people pleaser or you are looking to, I think as women, we want to nurture, we want to be the person for everyone.
[00:06:21] We wanna help other people, and that’s good. But then we also have to recognize the boundaries of, is this person for me? Is this a person that is praying behind my back or talking behind my back? And I think that that’s something that intuitive. you’ve got to watch for because those will be the women that, that you can understand is this person for me or do I need to create a safer space?
[00:06:45] And that takes work. I mean, I think it’s something that we can all identify and, but when you create those boundaries and find those amazing women, your success will soar because they say that we are. The average of the five people we spend the most time with. And I think that that is with success, emotion, and all different aspects of our lives.
[00:07:07] Leah: Oh, I agree. I was thinking that same thing. Two things that came to my mind was we are the, you know, five people that we are, we are surround ourselves with and I was thinking about how we can’t always fully control. who all were around, we can, we can set up slightly better boundaries, but sometimes, you know, someone might be saying, okay, but you don’t know who I’m married to.
[00:07:31] Mm-hmm. or you don’t know who my, my immediate family is. Mm-hmm. . And one thing that I. I think we do need real people. We need real people who we can talk to for sure, and we need to figure out how do I go find those people. But there is also a support system that can rally around you. That is the information age.
[00:07:51] That is the fact that we can put incredible thought leaders, incredible minds in our ears through our earbuds. Like what is happening right now where someone is like, you know what? I need some inspiration. I need some motivat. and they popped in their, their AirPods or whatever they did, and they’re listening to this.
[00:08:08] Those are also opportunities. to think about who you’re surrounding yourself with. I have my core people and I definitely think about who those are, but then I have the core influencers, right? Yes. That I’m also surrounding myself with mm-hmm. . And I’m thinking about, you know, these people, do they make me better?
[00:08:25] Do they make me feel, ah, feelings of comparison, of unworthiness, of not being enough? Or do they actually challenge me and inspire me? to believe in myself and be a better version of myself. Right? So kind of thinking about this, this, the, the five people that we surround, it can also be what we consume, whether that’s podcasts or books or YouTube or, um, getting into programs like coaching and masterminds and, and things like that, that are also going to help us elevate.
[00:08:58] So, okay. So definitely thinking. Who we are surrounding ourselves by. And you know, this concept of, I love what you said, are they praying behind my back or talking behind my back? And I thought of how, uh, once they show you who they are, believe them. Mm-hmm. believe what, what they are conveying. And either set some boundaries or, you know, offer more trust because you get to believe them in a positive way.
[00:09:28] So there’s that whole component. . One of the things that I think about when things start to get hard, I usually let go of the things that are gonna help me feel better first. You know, like, I’m extra busy. Oh, I’m gonna let the workout slide. Oh, I’m not gonna, you know, I, I don’t have time, so I’m not gonna eat the fu.
[00:09:47] The foods that fuel me, I’m gonna go to the foods that are, you know, foods that are gonna gimme a big crash. And so how do you help yourself when things are hard to set yourself up so that either A, you can make that period of time as short as possible, right? Like, we’re not prolonging and extending this pain or this negative experience, or just a hard thing because of choices that we’re making.
[00:10:13] Um, well let’s just start there. So how, how do you help yourself? .
[00:10:17] Camille: Yeah. You know the, it’s interesting cuz we’re recording this y let’s see, it’s mid-January. January 17th is the day that we’re recording this. And so I often, not that I stick to a New Year’s resolution and I get really hung up about being perfect in that, but I do like to identify and reevaluate every month, what season am I in, who needs me more?
[00:10:38] right now, do I need to focus more on my business, on my family, on myself? And whether it’s my family or my business, there’s always gonna be one that’s pulling more than the other. But for sure, myself always needs that fuel. And so the three things that I’ve been focusing on that are so, so specific, uh, is ma making sure, and I don’t, I don’t know if you share a video.
[00:11:02] I’ve been starting to carry around my water bottle with me. So it’s not so much a commit, a commitment of I’m gonna drink 40 ounces, there’s yours, I’m gonna drink 40 ounces of water a day, or a whole gallon. My commitment is I’m going to have my water jug with me because that means I will drink more. So I’m not saying that I have to have a.
[00:11:23] Amount. I’m just saying I’m going to physically make this commitment, and naturally that habit of drinking more water will happen. Another one that I have done for myself and taking care of me is I’m going to go on a walk every day. I’m recovering from a surgery where. typically in the past. I’m a very active person.
[00:11:41] I work out three to six times a week, very regularly, and I’m still recovering from a surgery from nearly five months ago, and that’s gotten me really down because that that well of working out that you made me feel so good. , it has kind of depleted where I’ve had to be like bedridden, and it’s been really depressing.
[00:12:01] I, I, I kind of attune a liken it to, uh, when you’re pregnant and you get to the end of the pregnancy and you’re like, I can’t do the things I wanna do, and it just, it can wear on you and get really depressing. And so I thought to myself, well, I’ve done this before. I’ve had four babies. I, you know, this is a place I’ve been before where I’ve been stuck in a position where I haven’t been able to do what I wanna do.
[00:12:23] That I know is a, is a really good win for me, being active and being outside. So I thought, okay, I can walk. So I’m gonna start there. So for, for you listening, what is something that you can start with and. For me, I’m gonna get out for a walk every single day, or at least six days a week. And I joined a program called Step Bet, which it’s this program where you, it’s, it is what it is.
[00:12:49] It is what it sounds like You put money into. A pot with a bunch of strangers, it’s an app and you say, I’m putting $40 in. And it challenges everyone to the same percentage of like what your regular steps are. And if you stick to that walking for six weeks, you get your money back. Plus whatever money is left from people who had to drop out early.
[00:13:10] And that’s a challenge that I had done before when I was recovering from a pregnancy and I thought, okay, I can’t do Pilates, I can’t do. Fitness training right now, but I can walk and so that’s something for me that I’m like, okay, I’m drinking water and I’m walking and I’m going to meditate at least three times a week.
[00:13:28] That’s something that I’m trying to do more every day would be too big of a commitment for me. But I’m really trying to like create that mental vibe of like, where am I in my own head space, because. What, no matter who we surround ourselves with, our own mind is where we live. And so it to me, if you can invest time there, that will have ripple effects beyond everything.
[00:13:53] And so for me, my headspace that I really work on is now meditation as well as audio, like we were talking about with books. And who do you surround yourself? What are, what’s inspiring your thoughts and what, what are you, where’s your headspace for the a short time? And I go through pockets of time like this where I’m like, Ooh, I love murder mysteries.
[00:14:13] Or like true crime podcasts. I love them. , if I listen to them too much, I find that my head space and my thoughts and where I am mentally declines, and so I have to be careful. For me personally, maybe for you, that’s not the case. You could listen to them all day long and that’s, you’re fine. But for me, I really love to make at least a commitment of 15 minutes a day where I’m listening to something that inspires or motivates me.
[00:14:39] And so those are my commitments for my, my current season. I’m not going to say for the whole. But those are my current commitments for my current season, and I think that that’s really important.
[00:14:52] Leah: I love that. So one of the big nuggets that I pulled from that is instead of looking at what we can’t do, focus in on what you can do.
[00:15:03] Right? Okay. You could be sitting there going, oh, I’m so frustrated because I can’t go to my workout classes, I can’t do my hit, I can’t do my Pilates. I’m missing out on all of these. and in that head space, then we’re probably gonna spiral down and, you know, just stay on the couch. But instead, okay, I can get out and walk and I’m going to focus on that.
[00:15:25] So I feel like that idea of, of shifting from, instead of what I can’t do, and when we’re in harder seasons, we get kind of stuck on. What we can’t do, getting to what we can and understanding that can is gonna look different. It’s gonna look, uh, probably a smaller version of our normal, but something is always, always better than nothing.
[00:15:48] And I loved how you were sharing that. You’ve, you’ve come up with, you know, these three things that you’re working on. I decided to shift things a little bit too, and I love just hearing different ways people are doing things. So instead of setting. Big lofty goals, which is what I normally do. You know, like there’s four or five like really huge goals.
[00:16:07] I decided, okay, I’m gonna put off the goal setting and I’m gonna begin January with just habit. Tracking. I’m just gonna work on doing some very simple daily habits that I would really like to work on, that I believe if I’m doing these things, I’m at a better version of myself. Mm-hmm. . So this is all in episode 28, so we will make sure we link to it in the show notes.
[00:16:29] But I talk about my favorite apps for productivity in 2023, and one of ’em I talk about is this habit. And so I put in all these different things that I just daily wanna do. It’s, uh, morning prayer, nighttime prayer, prayer with my family, scripture study, meditation, um, drinking my water, complimenting my husband every single day.
[00:16:48] Like I just have all these different things that I wanted to work on. Now, one of the things I decided to do is, cuz I put a lot of different things on there, was instead of beating myself up over the things that I was not doing every single. I was going to just see what naturally came easy and what I seemed to keep not getting to.
[00:17:05] And then based on the things that I wasn’t getting to, I was going to modify and find a different option for myself. So two of the things that were, have been on since January 1st, but I did not do regularly is, uh, work on learning the Spanish language and meditating. So I adjust. I haven’t adjusted Spanish yet.
[00:17:26] I just haven’t even tackled that one yet. I’m gonna have to like, really work through that one. But for the meditation, I decided to change it from, you know, it was on my, on my, uh, daily task every day. I mo it, modified it to three days. The three days that I. Have the least amount to do. So it’s like Sunday morning and Mondays, which is more my, like, that is my day to get things done.
[00:17:46] I don’t typically have calls or anything like that. And then, uh, I think Wednesday or Friday, so now I’m gonna try it again. I’ve created like, okay, I’m just trying to do 10 minutes and, you know, I simplified it for myself and brought it down so that I can, I can try to work on this because all of these different daily.
[00:18:06] and each of the things you know that you talked about wanting to do, drinking your water, meditating, walking, they’re all things that we understand. Like when I’m doing these things, I’m a better version of myself. So if we can get these things in place, then those big, lofty, audacious, incredible goals that we wanna go after, we’re gonna be in that better head space to get there.
[00:18:26] Now that brings me to my next question, which is all of us have experienced that when things are. , it’s really hard to motivate ourselves to do anything, you know, even that smaller thing. So how do you, what do you think helps you to, to do those things, even when you’re not feeling it? How do you overcome that?
[00:18:47] Camille: Hmm. You know, I think that there are some different solutions that have worked well for me, depending on the day, and I also do allow. As much as I can cuz I, again, am a mother of four, so we can’t always just like check out entirely, but I allow myself to have like do nothing days and I can work that into, love that, into my work schedule because I do have my own business, which is really nice.
[00:19:11] And I don’t have babies like napping and bottles and all the things, you know, so my life is a little right, like we know there’s different seasons. Yes. So this is a little bit of a different season. Just last week, I mean, this is very much like I had gone from the holidays. I was hosting sleepovers and birthday parties and you know, the gifts and da da da da.
[00:19:33] And I was like, I really just need to have a day. And I took a day and laid on the couch and watched a favorite show and snuggled with my dog and I was like, oh my gosh. I feel like such a re. And then I looked back at that and thought, yeah, I was like, why not? I mean, I’ve been going and doing all the.
[00:19:53] every day with my kids at home, every day, working business, all the things. It’s okay to take time for you and to decide what that looks like. So other days for me, a good phone call with a friend, I walk and talk is what I call them. I will do this in person or. on the phone, and I have specific people that I know.
[00:20:13] We either schedule it or we’ll do impromptu, it depends on, on the week. Um, but a walk and talk for me is essential because I think a lot of times it’s like therapy working through your, yeah, your questions or your issues or your struggle that you’re going through and. . Being able to say what you’re feeling out loud to someone who you feel safe with is one of the best ways to sort through how you feel about the thing that you’re experiencing or recovering from.
[00:20:39] And so I grew up as a journal writer and I still love to journal, but I’ve become a little more guarded in what I write as an adult, unfortunately. Cuz I think, what are my kids gonna read? Or this’ll be whatever.
[00:20:50] Leah: Yes, I know. Somebody burn all the journals when I am drawn. Yes, please. . Right.
[00:20:55] Camille: Cause it’s not about like my boyfriend Bobby, it’s now about my kids and my husband and like permanent people in my life that like you have to be a little more grounded with.
[00:21:04] So that’s why I think writing is. Beautiful and wonderful, and you can write it in eraser, you can write it and burn it if you need to, or you can write it and just know these are your personal thoughts and you have every right to feel the way you feel. But yeah, I think as an adult, for me, talking out loud and sorting through it and having someone ask me questions is one of the best ways for me to sort through a hard ti a hard time.
[00:21:29] So I think, you know, like we know eating. . Getting good rest is one of the best recoveries working out, moving your body. If you’re not feeling the motivation to do the things. What I like to do is take inventory of a joy list of what I know will bring me that joy in that recovery and that that head space of being able to move forward with.
[00:21:54] hope versus the days where I sit around and say, okay, I’m gonna do nothing. I’m gonna eat junk food. I’m gonna do all these fun things. I’m gonna go to a movie by myself. I’m going to order my favorite food. Whatever that thing is, that feels luxurious and rebellious to you. Um, and then evaluate how you feel and say, okay, that was fun.
[00:22:11] That was different, but now I need to do something. And I think that, yeah, you can notice the difference of like when you get moving, how much better you. .
[00:22:19] Leah: Yeah. I love it. I mean, sometimes we really do need that moment to just rest. Mm-hmm. , and I think you really nailed it where you’re like, it felt rebellious.
[00:22:30] Okay. If we’re, if we’re in a season where we’re like, oh, I’m spending way too much time resting, and my, my Netflix game is way too strong right now. Okay. You know what’s actually gonna probably make you feel better getting up and moving. But if on the flip side you’ve been in go, go, go, go, go mode so long, so hard, and you’re starting to.
[00:22:48] Signs of burnout, of overwhelm, giving yourself permission. And I will, I will be the first to admit that it feels really uncomfortable for me when I decide to do nothing. I’ve gotten much, much better at it over the years. Um, definitely like a decade ago. I mean, I. I, it actually felt like, like I was crawling outta my skin trying to do nothing.
[00:23:11] I felt so uncomfortable not being productive, and, and, and that in itself I recognized like, okay, there is a problem here that’s, I don’t think that’s what we’re supposed to be doing. So I really worked on it. I made myself sit in the discomfort and I really did actually feel like genuine. Uncomfortable and anxious and like yucky trying to just do nothing.
[00:23:37] But over time I did get more comfortable and I learned to love it and like, you know, appreciate it. And now have those like rebellious, you know, days where you’re like, mm-hmm , I am just gonna do nothing. But seeing, seeing those differences of when, when we need what, and then speaking to, you know, having that person that you talk to.
[00:23:57] that I agree. That is so powerful as long as we are so careful about who they are and how they show up for us. Absolutely. We’ve all absolutely had, right? Cuz we’ve all had that person who’s like, they, they hear the drama, they jump onto the drama and they’re like, yeah, you are right. You have been so wronged.
[00:24:17] They’re the worst. We need someone who can honestly be able to also, you know, say, or more so say. , are you sure you’re looking at that? Right? Because I actually think you maybe like, you know, need a nap and a, and a chocolate and you’re gonna, you know, see this in another light. I think about, for me, my sister is my person, right?
[00:24:39] Like that is who I call and I’m like, oh, I gotta talk through and, and I’ll share a real story. So, um, a couple weeks. . I called her and I was like, I am so frustrated, right? And I’m like, laying it all out there. And then she was like, me too. I’ve been frustrated about the same thing. So we’re both together, like, oh, aren’t they the worst?
[00:25:03] And then we both like, by the end of the call, we were both like, yeah, but they’re really not, huh? No, they’re not. They’re actually like pretty great and like we’re probably being a little bit of brats here with like these, like, it was really, really powerful and, and both of us at the end was like, I feel so much better.
[00:25:20] I feel a lot better about them too. This is exactly what I need. So. Mm-hmm. in, you know, what we talked about at the very beginning, the five people that you’re surrounding yourself with, making sure that we have people. , they’re not, look, they’re not, they’re not drama feeders. They’re, they’re peacemakers and they’re looking mm-hmm.
[00:25:39] to see the best in us, but also see the best in the people that we love, right? Like, you might have a moment where you’re frustrated, but like long-term, you’re gonna get over it and move on. And you need people who can help you see that and help you rise above, not sit in the, in the, the frustrated feelings or the anger, or the sadness or the, you know, whatever.
[00:25:58] Mm-hmm. .
[00:26:00] Camille: Yeah. And again, that goes back to that very first part when we were talking about how do you identify those people Yeah. Of who you can be safe with. But then also, yeah, who can, who can give it to you real, where they, they know and. I love it when you’re talking to someone and you’re like, and you know I love ’em, but I just gotta get this out because of this, this, this.
[00:26:19] Say you’re talking about a kid or a husband or a mother or father or or whoever and, and they know, they’re like, yes, I know. You don’t have to like, yeah, give me that. I know you. I know you do. You just need to process this, so get it out and then we’ll work past it and then you feel better. You know? So I think that what does get really dangerous is when people hold, So much anger, resentment, um, hurt, and they don’t find a way to be honest with themselves and a partner, friend, family member, whatever.
[00:26:53] And that’s what really leaves lasting damage, I think. So if you can get to a place where you can sort through it on your own and have a trusted friend or family member, and then after that, if there are still things that need to be said, say the thing. too often I feel like relationships are damaged because we’re just holding it all in instead of being honest with feelings and letting people be true in themselves without letting ego get in the way.
[00:27:21] And that, I mean, this is going down a whole other line of thinking, , but you know so much, so much of the people that we love and who really care about us want to hear us and to let us be heard. So if that’s something where you’re like, gosh, I’m in a bad place. , make sure you have people around you that you can really be vulnerable with, because that’s where you can heal.
[00:27:43] Leah: Yeah. Yeah. So, okay, so someone who is like, you know, I’m just in a bit of a funk and I used to be doing really great on a lot of things, and I’m, I’m not feeling it right now. What are the, what is your top light cage? Just start here. What would you say to ‘
[00:28:02] Camille: em? . Well, the first thing I would say is to have self-compassion.
[00:28:07] You know, there’s so much. Mm-hmm. Yes. I think that we’re in a culture where, especially as women, we look at ourselves as the doers. We have to be able to do all the things and everyone needs something and, and you look at history of all time with people and women. We usually back to the women at the well.
[00:28:28] We have communities of people who used to be part of our everyday lives who would help pick up the slack if we needed help with, with kid care or nursing babies or preparing meals or, you know, getting the work done that needs to be done in the fields or whatever it is that can be come so LA or so lonely.
[00:28:50] When we’re, if we are creating an island of ourselves and thinking I have to do this all on my own. . Mm-hmm. . Because if you start feeling that way, I have to do this all on my own. No one can help me. I can’t open myself up. That can become really dangerous and really depressing and lonely. And that’s not a place where productivity or our best selves will come through.
[00:29:12] So the very first thing I would say is self, self-compassion. Number one, that if you’re feeling like you can’t do the things, ask for help. And I relay this to women. in their families. I’ve coached people on how to do this in their families with their kids, how to help them with like becoming part of meal prep, house cleaning, you know, communication.
[00:29:36] This can be in your workplace where there’s a lot of people who are trying to wear all the hats and I’m like, Hey. , let’s work through what part of this is something you may be really good at but you hate doing. And it’s, it’s mm-hmm. low thing. Like it’s pulling you down Yes. Into the depth. Yes. And maybe you’re in a place where you have to wear all the hats and you need to take a break just for you.
[00:29:56] Um, but I think an evaluation of, first of all, if you were looking at yourself from the outside, would you be giving yourself as hard of a. as you are talking to yourself. Yes. Would you talk to a best friend this way if she was going through whatever this hard time is? So first, self-compassion, breaking down what it is that you’re doing, that maybe you could offload in different areas of your life.
[00:30:23] Communication with your partner, your children, your business, and then from there, looking for those pockets of joy. , you can refuel by doing things that, you know, all those things we list about those habit trackers, those small, small things. What are three things you could integrate today that would be simple?
[00:30:42] Water, walking, prayer, meditation, you know? And so, yeah, I think that so often we get stuck thinking we have to do it all, when really we just have to get that next best thing. What’s that next best thing where you could help to relieve that weight? .
[00:31:00] Leah: Oh, I love that so much. I agree with, with all of those suggestions of like that self-compassion, starting small looking for the community to help you, you know, I think of almost this idea of like, rally the troops or it takes a village and it’s not just a village for our children, it’s a village for us too.
[00:31:20] Mm-hmm. and, and looking for all those ways. Instead of feeling this resentment or these feelings of like, oh my gosh, I’m doing it all. Let others help you, and it’s gonna be a little messy, a little ugly at first as you train. Certainly me. Teaching and training my kids to, you know, start cooking the dinners and, and taking over a portion of that.
[00:31:40] It, it was a lot of me doing a lot as I was helping them through, but I stuck with it and it became wonderful. You know, if you’re hiring someone, there’s a period of time where you’re training them and it’s a little more awkward and uncomfortable, but then once they can help you, then you’re like, oh my gosh, this is amazing.
[00:31:57] So I love all of that. And the last thing that I would add, and I’m sure you did this too, Looking for fun, like yes. I, so you’ve said a couple times and it Kia’s making me think of like creating. Bucket list of sorts. I can’t think of another word for it, but essentially like, uh, a bucket list of just very small, fun things.
[00:32:17] Mm-hmm. , you know, like one day when you’re feeling really, really great, making this list of like, go to a movie by myself, go to lunch by myself. Go get a massage. Um, go, um, you know, make some popcorn and, and binge three episodes of, of, you know, some show that really makes you laugh or, right. Like, just this, this, get a pedicure, get a manicure.
[00:32:35] I don’t care. Like just this huge list. Fun things. Sometimes one of the big things is we just need to infuse some good old fashioned laughter. Smiles. Yes. Fun. Right? So whether that’s like a great lunch with girlfriends, but not one where like sometimes we need the one where we’re gonna vent. For sure. We all need that.
[00:32:54] Yes. But sometimes we really need the one where we are going to belly laugh and just like have a great time. So I think that’s the other thing is like when, when we, when it is rough, when we are feeling that funk. Seek out. You kept saying joy and I was like, yes. Seek out joy, seek out laughter, seek out reasons to smile.
[00:33:18] And you know, there’s so much power in that too. So, oh, this has been so, so good. Okay, Camille, tell everybody where they can find you.
[00:33:26] Camille: Yeah, so I am firstname.lastname@example.org. That is my website, as well as my handle on Instagram. T TikTok and Twitter on Facebook. I’m actually my mommy style, so I still have my podcast, which is Call Me ceo.
[00:33:41] I, I interview mothers building businesses and how they balance the busy there. And then also, um, my, my website, my mommy style.com has a million recipes for busy moms, travel tips, parenting, all the things. And I love helping women figure out the best balance for.
[00:34:02] Leah: I love it and I got to be on your podcast.
[00:34:06] Call Me ceo. So we will make sure we link to that episode. Plus of course we’ll put all of your links in the show notes, but I’ll have links to all of that so they can find your amazing podcast. And you know, they can start with, with that episode where I got to be on there with you. This is amazing. Thank you so much for joining me today.
[00:34:25] And. Being another voice that’s like honest and like, Hey, we’re all trying to figure this out. You know, mommy’s trying to build these businesses, build these dreams, but in a way that does not compete with our home, our health, or our happiness. Right. Finding, finding truly the way to balance the busy. So I You, you’re amazing at it.
[00:34:47] I’m so grateful that you are on
[00:34:49] Camille: today. Thank you. Thank you so much for having me. It’s been so much fun.
[00:34:54] Leah: Isn’t Camille great? You can just feel her warmth and kindness. It just exudes out of her. And I think my favorite nugget, my favorite thing that I’m gonna be thinking about for a while is those women at the well and that community. And really for me, I’m thinking about how do I be a better woman? at the well for others.
[00:35:17] Like how do I show up better for my family, my friends, my community? So that’s what I’m really gonna be focusing on and giving myself a little more Perme permission to be rebellious and have those days where I just. Do nothing. Oh my gosh. Okay. That’s it for this episode. If you could, would you take a moment and leave a five star review with just one sentence saying why you think others would love this podcast or why you love the Balancing Busy podcast?
[00:35:50] That would mean the world. It would be so incredible and you’ll help me build this community and bring more women to our well. Thank you again for being part of this podcast Balancing Busy podcast, where we are here to help you do less but better so that you can live a life that truly lights you up.
[00:36:10] All right, I’ll see you next time. .Hide Transcript